Governor 39% Rick Perry is the latest governor nationwide to receive an envelope deemed "suspicious". The governor's office did not report what was in the envelope. Other offices received envelopes with powder that turned out to be harmless.
We decided to speculate what could possibly make this envelope suspicious and what it may contain. Possible scenarios are listed below:
The envelope originated from Dallas, bearing a return address in Preston Hollow, but hand delivered by a black man.
The envelope originated from the office of Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison. It contained an invite to a wine and cheese party. Late at night. In an alley. No guests.
The envelope smelled like burnt vodka.
The envelope was pink and hand written...in turkey blood... with "Merry Christmas, from Sarah Palin, Leader of the GOP, dontcha know. Wink wink."
The envelope was pink and hand written...in unidentifiable blood... with "Merry Christmas, from "
The envelope was pink and hand written...in incredibly neat handwriting... with "Merry Christmas, love the former Secretary of State Geoffrey S. Connor".
The envelope contained a job application from Tom Craddick.
The envelope had a distinct smell of Swedish cheese.
The recycled paper envelope was brown and hand written...in ink made from compressed natural gas... with "Merry Christmas from T. Boone Pickens, ya'll." The envelope only contained hot air.
The envelope was empty. Normally the Governor expects money.
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